it was an unusual night in that it was just me and J-- well, not counting the ever-present little ones. But there were no older sisters around to engross me. As with every other precious time in life the evening ended with me wishing I had had more time and had done more. We played each other in Wii Fit, but not as much as I wished. We watched a movie, but I wish it could've been two. We didn't laugh together as much as I had hoped (rather, I didn't laugh enough) and we didn't end up cooking together as I would've liked. But we did tease, joke, and generally hang out. It's kind of strange to think of him similar to the sweet little two year old who snuggled me on the couch tonight. He used to be that boy, and now Ori is. Now he's a twelve year old boy who gets caught in the middle of two teenage sisters and two baby siblings. I think often about how our relationship strained and thinned over the years. I think often of how I wish it were some other way. I wish I knew how to connect with him now.
